Reconciliation: Celebrating Gods Healing Forgiveness
The purpose of doing penance is to help us change that pattern. Penance is for growth, not for punishment. Lillian Hellman provides a wonderful image of this process of reconciliation in her explanation of the word pentimento at the beginning of Pentimento: A Book of Portraits: When that happens it is possible, in some pictures, to see the original lines: That is called pentimento because the painter 'repented,' changed his mind.
Perhaps it would be as well to say that the old conception, replaced by the later choice, is a way of seeing and then seeing again. Confession of sin can only be sincere if it is preceded by the process of conversion. It is actually the external expression of the interior transformation that conversion has brought about in us. It is a much less significant aspect of the sacrament than we made it out to be in the past.
This does not mean that confession is unimportant—only that it is not the essence of the sacrament. Look again at the parable. The father, seeing his son in the distance, runs out to meet him with an embrace and a kiss. Through one loving gesture, the father forgives the son—and the son hasn't even made his confession yet! When he does, it seems the father hardly listens. The confession is not the most important thing here; the important thing is that his son has returned. The son need not beg for forgiveness, he has been forgiven. This is the glorious Good News: God's forgiveness, like God's love, doesn't stop.
In this parable, Jesus reveals to us a loving God who simply cannot not forgive! Zorba the Greek—that earthy, raucous lover of life created by Nikos Kazantzakis—captures this loving God when he says: Only bigger, stronger, crazier. And immortal, into the bargain.
He's sitting on a pile of soft sheepskins, and his hut's the sky In his right hand he's holding not a knife or a pair of scales—those damned instruments are meant for butchers and grocers—no, he's holding a large sponge full of water, like a rain cloud. On his right is Paradise, on his left Hell. Here comes a soul; the poor little thing's quite naked, because it's lost its cloak—its body, I mean—and it's shivering.
The repentance step in the conversion process is what is commonly called "making satisfaction for our sins," or "doing penance. This helps us see why the theology of the new Rite of Reconciliation suggests a reordering in the pattern that we were familiar with in the past. Venial sins, on the other hand, are less serious transgressions that offend and wound our relationship with God, but do not destroy it. A welcoming attitude and a quick greeting can go a long way toward calming the fears of the penitent who has been absent from the confessional for a long time. I can still prepare for genuine reconciliation by preparing to better trust God's love for me, based upon two convictions: If someone is struggling with sins of sexual impurity, I may take a moment either aloud for the penitent to hear or silently in my heart and say a prayer for the penitent to be able to live a chaste life. This article is part of our larger Prayers resource meant to inspire and encourage your prayer life when you face uncertain times.
The naked soul throws itself at God's feet. It recites a whole rigmarole and there's no end to it. God thinks this is too much of a good thing. Because God, you know, is a great lord, and that's what being a lord means: We need to really believe that our God, like Zorba's, is not some big bogeyman waiting to trip us up, but a great Lord who is ever ready to reach out in forgiveness. The Rite of Reconciliation reflects this image of a God of mercy.
Formerly, it was the penitent who began the encounter in confession—"Bless me, Father, for I have sinned"—not unlike the way the sinner of Zorba's imagination approached God, or the way the son in our parable planned to greet his father. But both Zorba's God and the parent in the parable intervened.
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In the same vein, now in Reconciliation it is the confessor who takes the initiative, reaching out, welcoming the penitent and creating a hospitable environment of acceptance and love before there is any mention of sin. Thus, the sacramental moment of confession—just one of the sacramental moments in the whole Rite—focuses on God's love rather than our sin. Of course the new Rite does concern itself with the confession of sins.
But one's sinfulness is not always the same as one's sins. And, as a sacrament of healing, Reconciliation addresses the disease sinfulness rather than the symptoms sins. So, the sacrament calls us to more than prepared speeches or lists of sins. We are challenged to search deep into our heart of hearts to discover the struggles, value conflicts and ambiguities the disease which cause the sinful acts the symptoms to appear.
A question that often arises is: Why confess my sins?
Reconciliation
And why confess to a priest? Why not confess directly to God, since God has already forgiven me anyway?
From God's point of view, the simple answer is: There is no reason. But from our point of view, the answer is that as human beings who do not live in our minds alone, we need to externalize bodily—with words, signs and gestures—what is in our minds and heart. We need to see, hear and feel forgiveness—not just think about it. We need other human beings to help us externalize what is within and open our hearts before the Lord, which puts confessors in a new light.
They are best seen, not as faceless and impersonal judges, but as guides in our discernment, compassionately helping us experience and proclaim the mercy of God in our lives. As the Introduction to the Rite puts it, the confessor "fulfills a parental function Contrary to what we may have thought in the past, this prayer, which completes or seals the penitent's change of heart, is not a prayer asking for forgiveness.
I may discover that the real pattern of sin has to do with a deeper dishonesty or lack of integrity: When the Light of God's love shines into this level of self-awareness, then I am touched by a powerful experience of reconciliation. Even here, in a place I might be most embarrassed and feel most naked, God is loving me and offering me wholeness and joy.
Celebrating Reconciliation Reconciliation is what God does. Receiving it and celebrating it is what we do. For those of us who are Catholics, the Sacrament of Reconciliation is a most natural way to celebrate God's reconciliation. We used to think of this sacrament as only about "confession" - that it was like a dumping ground for my sins, where I got forgiven, and I had to "pay a toll. It is God who forgives sins. And God forgives us the very moment that we come to the experience that we need forgiveness which itself comes through God's grace.
At that moment, I feel sorrow and a desire for forgiveness and healing. In that moment, I am reconciled with God. The reunion, the bond, the connection, the joy are all there. Three more things remain: When I experience God's forgiveness and love, I am invited to savor it and let it touch me deeply. Experiencing compassion, patience, understanding, and forgiveness is itself transforming. If I fail to appreciate what I have just received - freely and undeserved - then I will take it for granted and risk moving on without a real healing happening.
Then, I need to celebrate the reconciliation I have received. In the Sacrament of Reconciliation - individually or in common - I have the wonderful opportunity to ritualize that celebration. In the Sacrament, my personal journey is joined with the mystery of God's saving love, as seen in the scriptures, and in God's desire to save us all. There, in ritual form even if it is just me and the priest I "step forward" and admit that I am a sinner, express my sorrow, and I name the places in my life where God is shining a Light into what I have done and what I have failed to do.
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The Church teaches that there are two kinds of sin: Mortal sin is a deliberate and free choice of something known to be gravely wrong that destroys our friendship with God and separates us from him. For something to be a mortal sin: For example, murder, adultery, and theft would be considered grave or seriously wrong acts.
When a sin is mortal, one must receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation before receiving the Eucharist at Mass. Venial sins, on the other hand, are less serious transgressions that offend and wound our relationship with God, but do not destroy it. Although not required, we are encouraged to confess venial sins during Confession.
The Church asks that we receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation at least once a year. It is best to celebrate it regularly and whenever the need is felt. First of all, the fact that you are thinking about going to Confession is a sign that the Holy Spirit is leading you to be healed and reconciled. Please take comfort in the fact that we have a merciful God who loves you and wants to be close to you. The priest will help you during the Confession if you are unsure what to say or do.
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Our first step is to examine our lives and recognize our sinful thoughts, words, deeds, and failings; not only what we have done, but what we have failed to do. There are many useful guides to do this.