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Consider this a last call for grabbing cheap home financing:. In the spring, year fixed-rate mortgages were charging a full point less. Home equity With rates rising, fixed home-equity loans are a safer bet over variable-rate home-equity lines of credit. Credit unions offer lower rates 5. For me, I only trust my immediate family members and maybe some close friends with that type of information. Hahaha, yep, caved too soon! Hey Sam, everyone assumes Docs make money to burn. Of course in the current health care environment many financial and tech jobs bring in a lot more.
And there is very little growth in our industry. You make what you make frequently for years. But salary is only a small part of the equation. There are a lot of broke folks who make a great salary. Just look at pro athletes to see what little result income has on net worth. We only own what we can fit in our carry-on suitcases, for example.
But it depends on the person, their desires, and your motives for telling them.
Pay yourself first by contributing just one hour a day of your income to to do to change your whole financial life and never worry about money — if "Why are you going to go to work this year and work 2, hours this Smoked salmon is made by hand in London's last remaining East End smokehouse. And even if you write down every dollar you spend for 30 days (which, . As a way to reduce financial stress, the piece recommended to ease off budgeting, saying: . Step 4: Spend the rest without worry using a spending allowance If it reaches $2, too far before the end of the month, for example.
Personally, I was always inspired when I learned how much money people made to support their lifestyles — it encouraged me to work harder to get there myself. If people know you have money, they may expect you to pay more for things or give more to others. And giving is wonderful! Yes, in your case, might as well chronicle the amount in the book, and help people believe they can make more.
The truth is that privacy is golden. People can get so emotional and messed up over money that they forget all common sense. Such things are best left unmentioned. I feel the same way.
Almost nothing good can come from revealing your income. Like you said, their attitude will change either one way or the other. The question is, what happens when you do make a lot of money online.
Is there a point where you stop? That is a good point.
Sounds like a logical progression! I hope you get there! Your ex-friend had the problem. Definitely all his fault. Depends on who they are though. I donno Benny, even your close close friends, I think best not to tell them a specific number. Close friends are even more precious to risk losing! Thanks for this post. I never reveal my salary to anyone, especially the exact amount.
I even have that tendency myself unto others sometimes. This is especially tricky at work, given what will happen if you find out someone makes more for the same job, or perhaps even a lesser job. The opposite is for close friends, ironically. Yeah that makes sense too, actually. I think it really depends on the person. Many of my friends are in or about that mark.
I was accused of bragging one to many times after telling people my true income after they asked. So, I tell them numbers they can relate too. One downside of telling your friends how much you make is you end up forking up up the bill more often every time you go out. I totally agree, and I got the same advice from my father when I was young. Nothing good will ever come of it. What about blog income though? As we mesh our off line and online lives into one with these conferences. For one, very few people even know I blog. None of my co-workers and very few friends and family.
Of the ones that DO know, there are only a handful that have looked at it more than once. Talking money with people is always a little tricky. Too much is placed on what you earn and what you have. If two friends have the same mindset and are secure in themselves, even if the money gap is huge, the friendship should not feel a strain. It might be one thing if we are the same age, he went to the same schools, got the same grades, and worked at the same place.
Many companies consider it a firing offense to discuss salaries with other employees. I think that similar restraint is a good idea for friends as well. I never tell others how much I make. I think people who make relatively more than their peers have more reasons to hide their income than those who make a similar or lower salary than their group.
But friends tend to borrow money if they know you make more than them. They tend to judge you based on how much you make and how much you spend. I would even hide it from family, unless you are the most giving person ever or make a very low amount. Had to change the link on my comment above. It still points out to my old site.
Great post Financial Samurai! This is so true, some people freak out when they realize how much you make especially when they make less. The same is true for net worth. I never disclose that amount to family or friends. When I bought a house, I hesitated to tell my friends. I seriously contemplated acting like I was renting my house. I made the same mistake and told friends I bought a rental. I could say it without any underlying meaning, it it will just come across as boasting. Besides, headhunters tell me straight up what the competition is making. I had one friend, who when negotiating her latest new position, was given two offers, higher base salary vs higher commissions.
She called me and I ran the break even for her. Do I remember any of the numbers? Is she making significantly more than me? But part of my attitude about money might be because my group of friends is, for the most part, still people I met in undergrad.
You will understand after reading he never asked me either, not once after we got together? While trying to take a decision and explaining to her my situation, about wether to jump ship first and follow my dreams or wait it out, I blurted out that I make a six-figure salary. Keep in mind that I would have to pay taxes, get my own healthcare, retirement accounts, etc. I think there is a lot of good that comes from revealing your income, as long as you are talking to reasonable people. In reality, there are probably more people who have things worse than you and some of them are actually happy anyway.
Some people are bank tellers and some people are lawyers, some work in manufacturing and others are game designers. My friend is only about 5 years older than I am, and does make much more than I do. There are trade offs everywhere. It also means I know about layoffs way before they are announced, re-orgs and all that sort of thing because of the need to to financial planning around it.
Sometimes it really sucks to know these things and ethically not be able to speak about it. That said, I have childhood friends like you and I actually occasionally write about them. By family I mean cousin and maybe even direct siblings…. I think knowing your peer group salary can be very useful. I reveal my exact income every month since I do make it online, my readers got me there and seem inspired by knowing, and it keeps me going — like a kick in the pants to do even better.
Would keeping my mouth shut be simpler? I also reveal my exact income from my day job and my online business on my blog.
I would never come to my friends and family and tell them upfront how much I make… This would be seen as arrogance. However, I share my income with one of my friend as a source of motivation and because we always feel happy for him when he gets a raise, and vice-versa. If this guy was really your friend, he would not reconsider his friendship over a dollar sign. This has showed you how he values friendship.
What great ideas they had. How they have built a successful company. Being jealous of someone because he is making more than you is just stupid. You just have to do what he does e. It is as simple: I might be a little bit above average for my blue-collar profession, but less than average as compared to my white-collar counterparts. One of the early posts on my money blog talked talked precisely about my specific income. I figured folks out there might be curious about the income level of an average trucker.
When my income increases though, due to investments and other ventures, I can definitely see the benefits to keeping it secret. Great post here and great advice! So did your buddy buy a Maserati or an Aston Martin? I generally agree with your thoughts, but that is probably because I have the sort of income that would mark me for death at an OWS encampment. Conspicuous consumption is frowned upon and it is nice to be able to fly under the radar as much as possible.
In the overall discussion of personal finance there are one or two close friends that I do share income figures with when discussing goals and planning, if they are really your friends it should not be an issue. He bought a one year old Aston Martin DB9 convertible. It can definitely cause problems even though the industry is mostly thick skinned people and radical differences in compensation are the norm. And worrying about what kind of information you share based on the actions of an idiot is also foolish.
There is no benefit to having people like that in your life. Iron sharpens iron and people that are worth having around will only be strengthened by your success. All others can quickly hit the curb. From time to time, I share my compensation, I am an IT consultant, with three of my close friends. One of them owns IT business and the other is physician and third one is colleague strange right. First two of them acknowledged that I make more money than most people. Strangely, physician who is in internal medicine told me that I make more than him too. Other than occasional remarks, both of them treat me well and none of the past relationship changed.
The third one who happens to be my colleague happened to have lesser compensation than I did. So, we sort of planned in a way that he could get more compensation so it is almost on par with mine. To me friendship or relationship is give and take. I am always of the belief that the information you have should help so others in particular close ones and hopefully they leverage it constructively. My belief is that you should be share such sensitive information with close friends though my wife disagrees to the point that I am a fool.
So far my openness with my friends and relatives worked for me. I am open about everything not just financial stuff. They all appreciate my openness and it has served me well. I guess, it all depends on how you put it across so you do not come across as intimidating or arrogant. Sure, the relationship while strengthening, there could be some transition period where it could be little unsettling. In the end, it should work out fine as long as you choose right people as your friends. It is lot of stress if you keep sensitive information to just to yourself.
It is a great stress reliever too if you are open about things to your close friends and relatives. If at all, my relationships strengthened not that they were weak before. I agree with what you said. I feel frustrated whenever my mum or my relatives ask about my salary. I scared if I were to tell my mum about my salary, she will ask for more despite I have other obligations like car loan and study loan. It gives me nerve-wrecking moments and total anxiety! Hope you can advise! I think you did right by telling him. I think it was his fault for not evaluating the information correctly.
If he was reasonable with the counter he could of got a foot in the door with that company, and then worked his way up to what he is worth down the road. Maybe not, but she surely knows how much I make due to all my colleagues makes the same amount. I think it is just as well. I would certainly expect my fiancee to discuss finances, and in detail. Marrying a financially irresponsible individual for love is the height of stupidity. Your spouse will eventually drag you down into a pit of hell if you permit it.
To believe that marriage is solely about love is incredibly naive. Never settle for less. I do not like revealing my compensation at all, but I recently have for my last job and current one. I taught in Japan last year, and fellow English graduates wanted to know how much it paid. I did disclose this information to people I fully trusted or who were considering pursuing that role. I currently work as a technical writer, and in this area, not many English graduates are fortunate enough to land such a role.
So, a fellow English major was curious about my pay. I hesitated and said that I did not wish to cause tension or comparisons. He has a steady job recently received a promotion , and he wanted to know what a writer here could make. I reluctantly revealed my salary to him, and he congratulated me and said he was very happy that a fellow English major was doing well even better than most we know, in regards to compensation with our degree. Others have asked me, and I told them politely that if they are curious, they can research the average salary for technical writers.
When I made less than everyone else I knew, they treated me like I was a little inferior. When I started making more than everyone else I knew, they either became angry or expected me to pay for everything. Why withhold information from people? If someone asks, why not tell them? Plus it lets you know who your real friends are. Plus open discussions about money allow you to find out what you are doing wrong and what you are doing right with your cash. I just started my career and have expectations of going to senior exec. Starting off is easier because income is less and we all know how much folks make for the first years more or less.
But after the initial training phase, things get much more touchy as some people are superstars and achieve rocket income levels. I see both sides of this. If anything, it is nice to have a hard figure to attach to blog income because it might help motivate people to stick at it for years at a time, especially when it is far from lucrative for most! I get annoyed every time she tells everyone how much money they spend on everything. She is the type of person who judges others by what they have to show. She has tried a few different tactics to try to get me to tell her how much I make.
Because I choose to downplay what we make by not showing her what we have, she thinks we make less than her and leaves us alone. I was pursued by him. He asked me to guess? I said no thanks it ruins the person from knowing if a person likes them for themselves or what they are getting from them.. He was single for ever!!
He wore me out. You will understand after reading he never asked me either, not once after we got together? I was being used for sex, and as a cover! I was late by the 4th and he actually asked me for the rent by 5pm on 5th? I did offer to pay it back as well during my asking him. He says I should go find happiness that I want if I could not find it living there! But the questions are still coming! Have a frank conversation after you read this post why you must remain Stealth!
I know this is a shocker to you, but they are not your family. Unless you married your sister? I have been in my field for many years and through continued education and hard work I have found myself in a very blessed position. Well, one is that I come from a working class family and have greatly outpaced my surroundings. For example, my wife and I still live in the same starter house as we did years ago.
The tricky part is that as my career has grown, we are starting to exude success even though we speak little of finances. Personally, I have only disclosed my income range with close relatives. I correct these comments and they accommodate, but not without jibes. They rationalize this by saying they are proud of me, and that I should be proud of my accomplishments and so on. As a note, I am not arrogant or extravagant in the least, but my career life and obligations do put some pressure on my personal life.
There is likely an embedded assumption how well off someone is by their age, experience, and occupation. Life just happens and will only be rectified if the pain is bad enough. I agree with everything you wrote. For example, one colleague of mine 56yo feels compelled to pay for his kids education in full. Two are already in Ivies, one a senior, the other a freshman both seeking advanced degrees. The youngest — a junior in HS — is also bright and wants to attend a top school as well. Yikes, talk about financially burdensome! However, it still comes with the cost of restricting retirement savings at an age when this is wildly important.
Point is, if he subsidized payments or passed this full obligation on to his kids, they would be able to rebound with time on their side, and hopefully great future jobs. My coworker on the other hand will be in his sixties by the time this is said and done, and will have missed out on potentially hundreds of thousands in savings. Heaven forbid he loses his job or has a major life event. He would then become one of the people you describe seeing in the paper.
Maybe it would be admirable if they were helping other peoples kids, but their own kids are their own personal responsibilities. These are burdens the parents chose to take on. Very few people conceive unwillingly. American parents are driving nice cars and living in big nice houses, but many of them just refuse to help the kids out. I do not understand why. I am a Chinese. And my parents saved every penny through the past 20 years to send me to good high school high school is not free in China and college and paid my tuition, dorms, food and everything.
Most American parents are drowning in debt themselves. Add multiple kids into the equation, and the problem gets even worse. Anyhow, the end result is the same. Corporation owners have a guarantee of an endless supply of slaves who have no alternative but to get a job, and the middle class stays enslaved generation to generation. As teenager students, many of them do not have enough knowledge of society yet and nor can they make good decisions. Indeed, parents should guide them while they are choosing school and majors instead of letting them do whatever they want.
This was MY idea. A couple days ago he told me about 2 of his friends who are now in college in Az. We live in California. Attending college out of state is just ridiculous imo, unless you have a full ride, like his friend has to Missouri to play Football. They attended daycare,preschool,grade school,hs and graduated together. If so, that is ridiculous if you can pay in-state tuition! Public School Or Private School? Or if they go to college and change there degree a few times and then ending having a job in something totally different.
That will break the parent pockets!! I think that parent should help in someway but no necessarily paying the whole college tuition no matter what their economic situation that they have, cause nobody gonna save money for their retirement but them selfs. So everybody just have to plan accordingly.
Sometimes there is scholarship that students can apply, some scholarships take into consideration the parents income which I think is dumb considering that not everybody depends in their parents income and there are many resources now a day that can help with tuition. College can be expensive but there is colleges out of state like in Puerto Rico where u can expect to pay half of the cost if not less. But my point is that is good to help your kids within your mean whenever you can but not spend all your retirement money and spoils them f you are not financially capable of doing it.
For example, I had a friend long ago who dropped out of high-school and immediately started making k a year. Our lives became drastically different as well as the people we associated with. I was a poor engineering student while he was a well off 17 year old entrepreneur. This feeling of inadequacy compounds on itself, and salary plays a huge role. This train of thought quickly leads a person to feeling inadequate, which nobody likes to feel. It even causes some to give up completely if it goes on for too many years. This can result in people giving up their career entirely as they see no correlation between the effort they put in and their salaries.
I just wanted to add my 2 cents as a lot of successful people do indeed some to lose touch with basic human emotion and empathy. In the case of a regular job, it certainly can feel hopeless if your peer is significantly out-doing you. But in a lot of cases, the peers dont have jobs at all and are involved in various entrepreneurial endeavors.
Its just that their strategy has implicit control, leverage, and higher profit margins depending on which market , and your strategy sucks in comparison. There are many profitable business opportunities that require low startup costs. It comes down to your willingness to learn, experiment, grind, and do something outside the box.
People have made millions selling bug spray and paint remover. What I find most frustrating is when you know, for certain, you have more talent than a more financially successful peer, yet sometimes, by just by the sheer quirk of fate, they are raking in the dough while you are not. I did very much appreciate the observations on moderate living in the article. I quite happily drive a 13 year old Dodge pickup. Dandy rig, and looks nice, runs beautifully, has plenty of horsepower to meet my needs and my payments are super low. This is so true. But I learnt that life itself is like that.
It is unpredictable and unjust. There is also someone out there who was born, just like you, working just as hard if not more but not having enough to even buy food to eat especially all those, living in third world countries. Did you notice that one person gives so much attention to their spouse, so much affection and care and money and devotion, and yet their spouse cheats on them. Why is it like that? The most unjust situations you see is when one person never smokes, always exercises and eating healthy all their lives only to end up with a fatal incurable disease at the age of 35 and end up dying at 36; while someone else who is smoking and is overweight ends up living with no any kind of sickness until 80 and dies in their sleep with a smile at 82…….
When I saw with my own eyes a talented and extremely emotionally mature 13 year old girl, who got brain cancer and had only less than one year to live, while staying in one-room apartment with her poor single mother, I felt how unjust the world was. But the dying girl was so smart. She did youtube videos, encouraging others to love life and to love present moment. In her last year of life, she started doing her hobby — photography — through pain and chemotherapy side effects. In spite of losing strength and in spite of losing her life, she did what she loved, and she found various people to be her photo shooting models and made a beautiful gallery of her pictures of those different people before she died at the age of In her video message she said: Life is not worth being wasted on this.
Find what you love and do what you love while you have time. And that will be your true happiness. She died so happy and brought tears to all her fans. She had no money, no rich house, no father, not even a chance to grow up. Yet, dying so early and so unfairly, she was happier than most of us.
When you see those kinds of people in your life, you realize jealousy is more of an illusion. You see reality only half way. Accept the reality that there is ALWAYS someone who has more of something else no matter how rich or successful you are.
Also, understand that you never know the whole picture. Someone might have more money much easier than you, but do you know how long their life is? May be you are the one to live to years of age and not him — your friend-millionaire? May be you are the one who will survive an airplane crash but not your rich friend? Jealousy never sees the whole picture. It only imagines how one specific thing is unjust. But life is not just one little specific thing. In summary, when you are jealous, remind yourself that it is just an emotion that is not in line with reality. In reality, there are probably more people who have things worse than you and some of them are actually happy anyway.
If you want to compare, compare yourself to those who unjustly have so much less than you and yet they are the happiest people in the world. Thanks for the article Sam. I feel like I made a mistake, I told my best friend that I make a six-figure salary. She used to work until she decided to go back to school, where her international student fees are pretty high. While trying to take a decision and explaining to her my situation, about wether to jump ship first and follow my dreams or wait it out, I blurted out that I make a six-figure salary. She sounded a little surprised but took it in stride and we discussed the dilemma.
Is it terribly wrong for me to have done that? She keeps things in confidence and I trust her, I just feel bad about how I said it. They make a lot of passive aggressive comments to me about it as they apparently think I should be making less than them. I grew poor, I had a baby when I was 18 in highschool.
People told me I would fail. At 19 I got a job at a company making over , a year gross.
That same year I bought rental property. I have continued to expand, and make money off different things. Because I never went to college, when people ask how much money I make at 25 I told them. People think the opposite, I love to prove them wrong. I sure wish I would have seen this advice at some other point in life.
I have issues with family and friends over money, I am an Entreprenur spirt. I talk about money constantly. I filled a 13 to keep my estate because I lost my career. Its all ready said enough for however your living. Family should not know either. You should never tell… I have friends always using different tactics to try to gather information about how much I make, how much rent I pay, etc.
I always avoid the answer, sometimes in a very obvious way. Why do people need to know? There really is nothing useful they can do with that information. Its better not to reveal because you never know who will knock on your door in the middle of the night with knife in his hand.. I strongly dislike such types of people and would be rejoiced to rid them out of my life.
When it comes to money, materialistic things, relationships, etc. People will always pick up on little clues about your income level just by you living your life, no matter how humble you choose to live it. In a game of poker who has the power? I think it is wise not to reveal how wealthy you are to strangers. You would welcome unwanted dishonest friends who can be best avoided. However, I do not find any harm in revealing how much you make, to friends. If your friend envies you or hates you for this, then that friend is not worth having, in my opinion.
It is always good to make friends who share common interest than make friends in the same wealth bracket we are in. However, revealing a salary to co-workers is a completely different issue. Companies and corporations want you to believe that it is in your best interest to not reveal your salaries. This scenario is only in the best interest of the corporations. By sharing salary number with your peers you make sure that on an average you are not being underpaid and overworked.
I like this article. I think it is always best not to reveal how much money you make or if you get a bonus or any extra money to anyone. If you must share with someone,go online and share anonymously. I recently had to learn that the hard way,when I was supposed to get some financial help from someone and I told a couple of friends about it and how I was glad that I was going to get that financial help.